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A poem [Trigger Warning - Suicide, Self Harm, Loss] Gravity Frozen in this moment, three days have passed and I didn’t even feel a single rotation of the planet. One shot and I was pulled back by a force stronger than gravity to a time that left me reeling in his wake A blinding flash A heat of a love that burned too hot for either of us and threw me to my knees with a great resounding percussion of drums that silence a beating heart. Three days I’ve been stuck in a time that never truly belonged to us, yet shaped us. Three days frozen by a pain that held him captive for thirty years. Frozen, yet I know I will rise again and find myself moving forward on wings he showed me I had. ~ wjm Sept. 2011 Another poem pulled from the archives at my old blog. This one was written 7 years ago this week. The first few days of September I still think of him, my friend who ended his own life. My first experience of deep romantic love, back in high school, was with this amazing individual who taught me so much. From my sheltered naivety, he brought me an awareness that would set me on a path quite different than what I had imagined for myself. Shane, I miss you. 7 years have passed, but you're still a part of my life. Forever. If you want to read more, this is the blog post I wrote 7 years ago while in mourning. I share more details about my own story, and Shane's role within it. It's not an easy read. Trigger Warning for mentions of suicide, depression, r*pe, and self-harm. http://tarotmom.blogspot.com/2011/09/in-remembrance.html and this blog post written by my brother (in relation to the above link) http://tarotmom.blogspot.com/2011/09/my-brothers-letter.html . . . and, one more poem I wrote that week Wrung Out A twist, my heart is wrung like a dishcloth, Squeezed dry. A pain too strong and real, much more than expected… But it purifies. …twist and squeeze and drain the dirty water away. And then I can dry out in the sun, remembering the moon. ~ wjm sept. 2011

I'll admit it - like many people, clutter is a problem for me.  Last year I moved, and many of my belongings are still in boxes. Sharing a home with others, it can seem like clutter is a constant battle.  Things just seem to accumulate.  Yes, a lot of things are useful, helpful, convenient to have.  But it's amazing how things just add up, multiply, pile up, and become a mess. I've realized and accepted long ago that clutter can be a source of stress in any environment.  Have you noticed that after you clean up a certain room, the energy in that space will just feel better?  Clearer.  Like you can breathe easier and just relax better?  That's because everything has an energy to it.  Just like your crystals and gemstones or magickal tools carry a certain vibration, so does everything else in your home.  When you enter a room, you will pick up these subtle vibrations and it will immediately effect how you feel. With the Sun in Virgo, I feel the drive and longing to get my household in order. I want to get organized. I want everything in it's proper place, easy to find - and less "stuff" around me in general. Virgo is the Mutable Earth sign of the Zodiac - ruled by Mercury and the 6th House of Health & Service. Mutable Earth is willing to change and move things around in the physical environment in ways that Fixed Earth (Taurus) might not be as open to, and the analytical thoughtful mind of Mercury as the ruler here brings in the critical nature that will allow us to re-think and re-design our home or office to be more functional. The polarity-point or balancing point of Virgo in the zodiac wheel is Pisces. When Virgo is too critical and analytical, it needs the faith and non-attachment of Pisces. When Pisces is too aloof or caught up in escapism, it needs the focus and realistic nature of Virgo. I find this relevant now as I am writing this under the Pisces full moon and thinking both about getting rid of clutter (Virgo) and creating Sacred Space in my home (Pisces). We all have heard of having a "Sacred Space" in our home... it may be an altar, a meditation area, a yoga room, etc.  It is good to have a place devoted to a spiritual practice; a place that you go just for meditation or prayer.  If we use the same space repeatedly for that purpose, and keep it clear of clutter and decorate it with things that bring us peace - it becomes a Sacred Space and will amplify our ability to meditate, pray, or focus on spiritual matters in that area.  But really, why keep it to just one part of our home?  Shouldn't our entire home be a place of spiritual respite?  We should be able to feel safe, relaxed, and spiritually fulfilled no matter what part of our home we are in! Make Your Clutter Clearing into a Spiritual Experience I find that usually when I'm inspired to start getting rid of clutter in my home (again) it usually coincides with an internal need to remove blocks and move forward.  As I work on the physical clutter, I experience the removal of internal blocks.  It can be a powerful time of personal healing, and a wonderful "active meditation" that serves a dual purpose of healing my home and my inner being.  As I approach an area or task, it helps me to call upon Goddess to help me make the act of cleaning into a spiritual practice.  Keeping a mindful awareness is key.  You'll have to ask yourself as you pick up each item; what purpose does this serve?  What energy do I feel when I see or touch this item?  Have I used it in the last 6 months?  Does it remind me of a person or a time in my life - and does that memory trigger positive feelings or negative ones?  If I keep it, is there a better place to keep it? It can be easy to get overwhelmed in this process!  Try to break down each room into smaller areas and just focus on one area at a time.  Pick something you can complete in one hour or less.  So instead of thinking "I need to clear the clutter out of my bedroom closet", make a goal of one box or shelf in that closet. Before you begin, set your intention.  You might want to light a candle and say a prayer or affirmation before you begin.  You can call upon a specific Deity to help you with the process.  There are many household Deities who love to help you do anything that blesses your home.  You can devote your work into an offering to them, or just ask them to assist you with your goal.    You may want to research some household Deities to see which you are called to work with (or just try working with the Deities you already work with for spiritual purposes).  You might find you're called to work with a different Deity for a different room or part of the home depending on the type of energy in that space or what you want to attract to that space. A short list of Household/Hearth Deities; Hestia (Greek Goddess of the Hearth & Home) Vesta (Roman Goddess of Hearth) Brigid (Celtic/Irish Goddess of the Home) Tsao Wang (Chinese God of the Home & Kitchen) Kamui-fuchi (Japanese Goddess of the Hearth) Kamado-no-kami (Japanese God of the Kitchen) Gabija (Lithuanian Goddess of home protection) Ertha (Domestic Deity of Norns / Northern Europe) Frigga (Norse Goddess of Domestic Life and Household management) Bes (Egyptian God of Household protection) Artemis (Greek Goddess - protection, goal setting, manifestation) Kuan Yin (Chinese Goddess of Compassion & Protection - especially for Mothers & Children) Lakshmi (Hindu Goddess of Blessings and Abundance) Archangels that can be called upon to help with Space Clearing Jophiel - "Beauty of God" - helps to beautify space, clears away negativity to help us see beauty in all things, supporter of artists. Michael - "Warrior of God" - protects lightworkers from lower energies - will help protect the home and escort away any negative energy. Raphael  - "Healer of God" - heals physical and emotional pains and ailments, also helps remove negative energies to promote healing in that area Message from Archangel Jophiel ; "Your home and work environments affect you on many levels. Clutter can erode your energy, creativity, and prosperity. I'll help you find the time and motivation to clear interferences from your physical environment. Together, we'll release anything thats not serving you. We'll donate, recycle, or discard unused items. We'll open the windows to circulate fresh air in the rooms. And I'll escort lower energies away. You'll notice huge improvements in all areas of your life as a result of this endeavor." Are you feeling drawn to remove clutter and create more sacred space in your home? No matter what time of year it is when you discover this post, the balancing point between Virgo and Pisces is a great one to tap into for this process! And if you're really drawn to work more closely with Hestia, Goddess of the Hearth & Home, I invite you to come check out the Hestia & Vesta Devotion Course!

Spica; Virgo’s Light My eyes search the darkened cosmos Searching for a light to lead me Orion, he is always there, and Ursa Major dominates the night sky I recall an ancient phrase; “Arc to Archturus, then speed on to Spica.” Following the Arc of the Great Bear (once the pure and chaste Callisto, princess of Arcadia; Raped by Zeus and cursed by Hera) Past her protector, Archturus To find Spica, brightest star of Virgo - A yellow sheaf of wheat, Golden ear of corn White Spark of light Fire of Hearth, In the hands of a something so Pure That one name will not suffice. She is the Virgin, Virgo Astraea; Goddess of Purity and Innocence who clung to hope for human kind longer than any other Shala, Goddess of Grain Hestia, Goddess of Hearth and Home Vesta, Keeper of the Flame The Blessed Virgin Mary Father Time has watched her transform, Watched her name change, Watched as Man’s study of Spica Brought the knowledge of the Equinoxes. What other secrets may she hold? Father Time, the Hermit only nods and winks As if to say “Time Will Tell,” And he turns to walk away “but don’t give up the search”. And suddenly I know I am beautiful I am pure You are beautiful You are pure And Astraea can return; Through us. ~~ WJM @Hestia's Muse written Sept 1, 2010 I first wrote this poem in 2010, just as I was beginning to learn about and work with Hestia. I was also learning more about astrology, and had recently aquired this beautiful tarot deck called 'The Celestial Tarot' in which each card is related to a specific constellation or star. Virgo season had just begun and I was inspired by The Hermit card to explore more depths of the sign Virgo - a sign associated with Hestia (The Virgin). Through that study and my meditations, this poem emerged. The constellation Virgo represents a Virgin female form holding a sheaf of wheat. She is associated with Hestia (Greek), Vesta (Roman), Dike (Greek), Shala (Sumerian), Isis (Egyptian), and Astraea (Greek). Astraea means "Star Maiden" or "Starry Night" and she was the daughter of Astraeus and Eos. She was a maiden goddess of purity and light, and was the last of the Olympian Gods to remain dwelling on the Earth with humans through the Golden Age. Mythology tells that she loved mankind deeply and wanted to stay as long as possible, but could not stay and also maintain her purity. Finally during the Iron Age it was said she ascended to Olympus, fleeing the growing wickedness of Humanity and became the constellation Virgo - to shine her light of purity on us from a distance. Legend also holds that one day Astraea will return, ushering in a new Utopian Golden Age. Spica is the brightest star of the constellation Virgo, and 15th brightest star in the night sky. It was through observation of this star that the Greek astronomer Hipparchus discovered and proved that the stars move across the sky in a phenomenon we now know as the "Procession of The Equinoxes". The appearance of Spica in the night sky is also related to the Spring and Fall Equinoxes - as Spica is only visible to the Northern Hemisphere from March to the end of July and not visible to the Northern hemisphere during fall and winter. The name "Spica" means "Ear of Corn" or "Sheaf of Wheat" in Latin. Spica is actually a binary star system, with it's primary star about 10 times bigger than our Sun. The secondary star is slightly smaller (7 times bigger than our sun), and in such a close distance to the primary star that we cannot optically separate the two. They orbit around each other every 4 days. I find it fitting that the brightest Star in Virgo is a binary star- as Virgo is ruled in Astrology by the planet Mercury; the Dual Minded. As we enter Virgo season, (August 23 - September 22) the Virgo constellation and Spica are no longer present in the night sky - but rising with the sun in the mornings and following the sun across the sky all day. The sun's rays now bless the earth through The Virgin's sector of the sky. Apollo (The Sun) is visiting the Temple of the Virgin, learning and transmitting the lessons of Purity, Devotion, Service, and Sacrifice as written on the temple walls by Goddesses like Hestia, Vesta, Astraea, Dike, Isis, and Shala. Carrying the sheaf of wheat or ear of corn and guiding us through our time of Harvest. Hail the Virgin! Hail the Harvest! Io Astraea! Io Hestia! ---------------------------------------------- Interested in learning more about the Goddess Hestia? Check out the Hestia & Vesta Devotion Course - now open for enrollment! #Astrology #Virgo #Hestia #GreekMythology

(A post from the archives at my old blog. . . I originally wrote this peice on January 27, 2015. I felt called to revisit and share it again now. ) 1/27/2015 I'm intrigued.  My interest has been sparked by the name of a Goddess that has crossed my path recently.  And as it goes when a Goddess taps me on the shoulder, there's a lesson here and I'm in the midst of it.  A few weeks ago, this story came across my facebook news feed.  I read it and I thought, this is so interesting, and beautiful, and . . . wow I can relate!  The article was called Why Lying In A Broken Pile on Your Bathroom Floor is a Good Thing and it's about a little known Hindu Goddess - Akhilandeshvari - The Goddess of Never Not Being Broken.  She's an aspect of Parvati (at least from what I can find in my online searching; and in Hindu mythology most of the Gods and Goddesses are all different aspects of each other)  The Goddess of Never Not Broken - the eternally broken Goddess... resides in the state of brokenness.  You know, that raw place of grief or loss where the soul feels so open, like the world and everything can just reach in and touch it?  Yeah we've all been there.  Akhilandeshvari lives there.  Riding on the back of a crocodile (primal instinct and fear) through the river (the eternal energy flow of the universe).  Yeah.  Powerful.  I know that those moments of brokenness have been some of the most transformative experiences of my life.  After all, when we break apart in pain or grief, we have to redefine ourself, rebuild our life - and we usually come back from that place a stronger person.  It's where that annoying phrase "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger" comes from. So, I made note of this interesting Goddess, told myself I would research her (this was after only reading the article in the link above), and moved on with my life.  Doing my thing.  Taking life in leaps and bounds!  I've been in a state of rapid manifestation and big changes.  Empowered.  Fearless.  Taking big steps and making big changes.  I've been working on an online class to get Certified as a card reader (Tarot & Oracle).  I quit my unsatisfying retail job.  I've been meeting new people and working on starting and organizing a social group for local Pagans in my area.  Experiencing new things.  Feeling so together.  I'm going after my dream, my life purpose!  Amidst all this I also had a chance to get my Reiki 1 certification.  Great!  Adding Reiki to my life just seems so perfect, so wonderful!  And it has been!  The class I took when I received my Reiki 1 attunements was wonderful! In Reiki 1, we receive blessings that help awaken our inner power to heal ourselves and our loved ones.  We learn that Reiki is a lifestyle, and a big part of the journey is in meditation and working on ourselves.  Focusing on Gratitude.  Learning energy awareness.  Healing and being open to receiving healing . . . on a daily basis.  It's really all so wonderful!  But if you've ever had any kind of energy work done before (or gone through a detox) you know that as you accept that healing - all the negative has to come out.  Things from the past bubble to the surface. So here I am, literally lying in a broken heap on my bedroom floor.  I knew that my Reiki teacher had told me that "things from the past might come up, or you might face uncomfortable feelings."  And I knew that this was just a part of healing - sometimes we have to shine a light on those deep dark places.  But damn.  I mean, This is stuff from years ago that I thought was resolved.  I'm asking "Why me?" and "Why Now?" and "can I do this?  Am I strong enough?  Is it time?  Am I ready?"  All that confidence I had, this blissful cloud of change just dissolved beneath me and I had to realize - changing the outside (the external) ain't worth shit if the inside isn't changed too.  And I'm realizing I have to redefine myself, yet again.  Rebuild myself, yet again.  (How many times have I been here?)  And I'm feeling broken and raw and unsure of myself, and then . . . I remembered Akhilandeshvari.  The Never Not Broken Goddess. So, I started doing more research.  I found another article describing this Goddess "Pronounced ah-kee-LAN-desh-va-ree, "Akhilandeshvari" translates as "Never Not Broken." She shows us the power and opportunity of being broken into pieces by heartache, disaster, great fortune, and other life changes and traumas. However She takes this to the furthest extreme, purposefully keeping Herself broken wide open, allowing Herself to flow with every current, creating and fragmenting and recreating Herself endlessly. She steadfastly refuses to paste Herself together into a stable form, shunning the limitations that She'd have to abide and the false identities that would hide Reality. She rides on a crocodile: the very survival-fear that keep most of us chained to the known and routine is Her flying carpet! She is not controlled by the need to keep her identity consistent, or even alive. She dances and spins and breaks herself into shards of light, tossing out new possibilities for herself like flower petals from a cherry tree. The Goddess Never-Not-Broken promises that the greatest magick is in the transformative moments: the heartbreack, the uncertainties, the pause before we hit the ground... and what we do with ourselves after we land. " I found a few more websites with scattered and brief information, much of it the same from one site to another.  But that's part of the beauty of this Goddess - the simplicity of being broken.  Undefined.  Ever changing.  Defying definition and boundaries by being constantly in the flow of that river, riding the back of that crocodile, breaking apart and finding power in that state.  A strong sense of peace came over me as I read more.  Well, not "peace" . . . but just knowing.  Trusting.  I can do this.  I am powerful, even when I am broken.  I am still connected to all that Divine bliss, even in my moments of pain and doubt.  Yes. Akhilandeshvari has become part of my personal pantheon, and I invite Her to tap on my shoulder and get my attention any time that I forget that being broken is beautiful. I also found this traditional chant attributed to Akhilandeshvari, it is quite beautiful and I think I will use it for meditation to help me connect with this aspect of the Goddess! Also -  found some beautiful art inspired by this Goddess - I think an artist of any kind could really connect with Her. . . because as we create something new we often have to break ourselves into pieces, and as we rearrange them and put those bits of ourselves back together in a new way, art is born. - W.J.M Hestia's Muse 1.27.2015 Update August 20, 2018 - I still work with Akhilandeshvari from time to time. Whenever I am feeling broken, she reminds me that this is when I am at my most powerful. I have found ways to channel all that pain, emptiness, fear, or heartbreak into my creative process, my work, and my healing. She's been with me a lot this past month. It is both humbling and empowering to see Brokenness as Divine. I am no-thing. Yet when I am no-thing, I am Infinite Potential. Infinite Potential is Divine. I am Divine. Thank you for reading, and let me know in a comment if you feel drawn to this Goddess or others like Her. #Akhilandeshvari #Goddess #ShadowWork #Reiki

Inspired by my previous post about Centaurs, here is a Tarot Spread I designed for use with Centaur or Sagittarius energy.  It can be especially powerful to use when the moon is in Sagittarius. As with before any reading or ritual, please remember to ground and center, and set up protections in whatever way you do.  Calling on Archangel Michael, or asking for a ring of angels to protect you, or calling the quarters and elements and setting a circle of protection by visualizing a shield of light around you.  Whatever feels comfortable and safe to you. Tarot Spread - Lesson of The Centaur Make sure you read the previous post all about Centaurs.  There I cover the three gifts or lessons of the Centaur which are; Knowledge/Wisdom, Victory/Assertiveness, and Healing. With this spread you will use Temperance as a Significator card. Simply find this card in the deck, and place it in front of you.  Meditate on the meanings of this card and the Centaur's lessons.  Use the affirmation, "I enthusiastically manage my needs and resources to bring about health and harmony".  Think about the meanings of the Temperance Card of integration, balance, moderation, and transformation.  Think about the Centaurs and how they teach us integration of Healing, Intellect, and Passion.  In what ways in your life do you need this integration and balance? Prayer (while shuffling the cards) "I call upon the mighty centaur: warrior, hunter, healer, seeker of wisdom, and great teacher.  I call upon you now, be my teacher.  Show me what I need to know at this time and teach me to integrate body, mind, and spirit." Divide the deck into three stacks.  Take the first stack from the top of the deck, and place it in position one.  Take the second stack from the deck, and place it in position 2.  The remaining cards go in stack 3.  Just let the cards naturally divide themselves into these stacks. You will turn the top card of each stack over. Card 1 is Centaur's teaching or lesson for you at this time concerning your healing. Picture the Centaur handing you a cup of a healing elixir.  The card will show you what area of life this elixir will help you to heal.  This could be for your physical health, or emotional/spiritual healing.  Take this gift with deep gratitude. Card 2, the scroll, is Centaur's message to you about wisdom and learning.  This shows you where in your life you need to apply your intellect.  It could be something you need to learn more about, or an area of life in which you need to apply wisdom and logic rather than force or action. Card 3, the Sword... this is where Centaur is offering you help in the form of action.  Your passion and assertiveness will help you in this area of life.  This is also where the centaurs will offer to help fight for you to obtain victory in your goal. Meditate and journal about all three of these cards.  Be sure to interpret them through the lens and lessons of the Temperance card, which reminds you that each of these energies of the cup, scroll, and sword need to be used in moderation, balanced with each other, and integrated into your life with patience. Thank the Centaurs for their lessons.  You may wish to leave them an offering of some kind (food or drink - they really love wine or alcohol if you have any to put in a small cup or bowl to leave for them in gratitude for their help) or at least sincerely thank them for their help. Blessed Be!

Hey, look! A new website! Yep, here I am building new website 2 weeks before the launch of a new course and the start of my the next Reiki Level 1 Course. This was not the plan, but... I'm not sure what happened to my old website. Hacked? Server Glitch? Who knows. It's gone. The saddest part is that all my old blog posts are lost. The even sadder part is that before Mercury went retrograde I thought to myself, "I should really backup my website and make copies of all my blog posts." And I did make some copies of the main pages, but I hadn't started on the blog posts yet. Then Mercury went retrograde and things got weird (as they do) and I got busy and distracted. The trickster planet went rogue and thought, "oh hey here's a chance to teach an astrologer a lesson." Ironically, I usually enjoy the Retrogrades, and don't like the "doom and gloom" outlook on a Mercury Retrograde. Generally I think Mercury gets a lot of shit for being a great teacher - his challenges (or shenanigans) are often great lessons and opportunities for personal growth. However, it was the second time I have had my website up and dissapear during a Mercury Retrograde! This time I decided to move to a new Host / Server and got a new domain name (now at .net and no longer at .com) I'm really sad about the lost blog posts as many of them came through in inspired moments and would be impossible to recreate. But I am in acceptance; learning lessons of non-attatchment (and to always make a copy of my blog posts from now on! Thanks for reading! I'm mostly just testing out the new blog features and how to use this new website. Thanks for your patience as I get things up and running again! #Mercury #MercuryRetrograde #Updates